Superwomen Syndrome, Really?

My New Normal

Over the weekend we had Sara, Ryan, little Landon home for our last Christmas--or Epiphany for the holiday season.  I kept all of the Christmas decorations up since Sara and her family were not able to come home for Christmas.  I really wanted Landon to see Papa Joe & Nonna's house at Christmas.

Yes, I decorate...I have snowmen, santas and Nativity scenes throughout the house.  As Jenna said, "Mom the house looks great!  Well, actually it looks like Santa just threw up, but I like it!"   

So, Sunday after church, I kissed the kids good-bye and they headed back to their home--yes, a few tears appeared as the car drove off.  Jenna went to work.  Adam was cramming in as much visiting of friends while home as he possibly could.  
Joe and I knew it was time to take the snowbabies, Christmas trees, jinglebells and stockings away until the next Yuletide.  

And so it began.  I started to get the after Christmas blues.  You know...
Naked house.
No familiar carols playing.
No more macaroni and felt ornaments on an evergreen.
No UPS, or FEDEX deliveries.
No Christmas cookies left.
Even the whiskey and egg nog were gone!

Today, Adam left for Boston.  I took him to the airport.  The entire drive to Love Field I was amazed I wasn't emotional at all.  In fact in some regard, I was quite proud of myself "manning up" and just taking care of business of getting kids to and from... 
  

I pulled up to passenger drop off at Southwest Airlines...the airline we luv the most...parked the car, pushed the button for the lift gate, got out of the car...and as Adam  pulled his trumpet case out of the car a gush of tears fell.  Not one or two tears...it was Niagara Falls--complete with erratic breathing.  

OH I WAS SO MAD AT MYSELF!  I really didn't want him to see me cry...for heavens sake the kid has been out of the house for years...but that "letting go" is still just so hard for me.

Adam and Pirate 12 years ago

I must invision Adam as a boy, rather than the terrific man he has become!

Adam walking me down the aisle at Sara & Ryan's wedding

I remember my mom having a very difficult time with the whole empty nest thing...

and I remember making a conscious decision I would not be like her (I mean that with a great deal of respect, I loved my mother)...but the sadness, and the feeling of being depressed, waiting for the next visit from one of her half dozen--her children were her world!  

So early on as a young mother I remember making a conscious decision to be involved with our kids activities, but I also got involved with a career, and then with volunteering...PTO, Sunday School Teacher, Girl Scout Leader, School Board President...then later taking on a high pressure job--something just for me--or so I thought...these activities, while they gave me more of an identity than "Sara-Adam-Jenna's Mom"...were all about the kids.  

Joe told me early in our marriage that he thought I had "The Superwoman Syndrome".  I thought he was crazy and making it up, but a woman by the name of Marjorie Hansen Shaevitz actually studied and wrote a book about women who essentially feel they have to be June Clever and Murphy Brown or for the younger audience, Robin Scherbatsky -- rolled into one person.  Some women can do it well...I seemed to trip over my cape--a lot!  

When I really think about it, yes--I do things that I can be proud of that are separate from my kids' activities.  But I am really no different than my mom. My children (and Joe) are my world.

And at the end of the day, while I am very proud of all my kids...I love my role as a mom, but in reality that "mom" is really gone--which as parents--that's what we pray and hope for...that they are ready and prepared to be launched out into the world.

The way I am reacting to this new normal has taken me by surprise...so I will have to work harder at letting go.  I know that I am so very blessed that Joe and I have three great kids to enjoy when we are all together and miss when we are apart! 

I Lasso loving my kids as adults...or at least I will try to lasso!

Exciting News! Mama's Due with Baby #2!

Sara and Ryan surprised us a few months ago--at Thanksgiving--with some exciting news.  They arrived at our home during the late morning.  As our grandson was brought out of the car, it was the first time I really think he remembered the house, the dogs, and of course...Papa Joe and Nonna!  I was more excited to embrace Sara and Ryan and couldn't wait to slowly go to Landon to see if he would come to me...I scooped him up, but noticed he had a cute little tee on...being way too excited to "read", I brought the kids in the house and had lunch ready for them.  Putting Landon in the highchair, I kept trying to compute what the tee said.  Their son sporting a tee...

T-shirt read:

Club "Only Child"

Membership Expires July 2013!

I looked puzzled I'm sure...first I looked at Sara, then Ryan, then the tee again.  Finally I said--rather truthfully I squealed to Sara...are you going to have another baby?  I jumped up and down, hugged Sara and Ryan and could not stop smiling...Sara can attest to the fact that I did indeed jump up and down with elation!

Papa Joe came home shortly after the kids had lunch and I was trying to keep myself contained...anyone that knows me, knows all too well this can be a challenge for me...I kept indicating that he should "READ" Landon's tee.  Joy swept over his face and he immediately had hugs for everyone.  Jenna returned home from work just thrilled at the thought of another  nephew or niece was on the way.  Adam found out by way of Facetime on my iPhone since he was still in the Northeast for school.

Ryan and Sara were just beaming and said they were so excited--and remarked how hard it was to keep it a secret for a month from us.  It was still very early...so they asked that we not share the news with anyone.

Sara and baby are almost 4 months along in the pregnancy, coupled with the fact that Sara literally can't keep the baby news in much longer...as baby #2 has decided to make his/her presence known! 

So as we begin the New Year, we have so much to be thankful for...the arrival of a new family member is just the beginning!

So July 7th is the ETA for Baby Corl #2.
We are praying (and always appreciate prayers) for a healthy baby and a healthy pregnancy and safe delivery for Sara and baby!

I Lasso enjoying the amazing joy our grandson brings into our lives! 

I Lasso the anticipation of another grand baby to love!

The Gautille Gazette 2012

The Gautille Gazette Goes Electronic!

Joe and I want to extend our warmest wishes during this Christmas season to all of our friends and family!  We thought we would go "green" with our family update, and post it electronically on my blog!  

Nonna and Papa Joe

We went to Pflugerville, TX  earlier this month to celebrate Christmas with Sara and her family!  It was so much fun to see Landon's eyes light up with excitement when he saw the Thomas the Train table and trains!

Landon Lee Corl and his choo-choo!

It has been a long time since I've stepped foot into a Toys R Us, but it didn't take long before the memories of the Lego and Barbie aisles came flooding back to me from my days as a young mom.  Landon is 19 months old and a complete delight!

Ryan, Landon and Sara

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Sara and Ryan Corl

I love being a Nonna and Papa Joe has also embraced his role as a grandparent! Sara and Ryan make a wonderful parenting team! Sara, a former elementary education teacher has changed her career to Stay-At-Home-Mom.  She recently shared that while there are challenges and sacrifices to staying home, there are wonderful nuggets of joy too.  One afternoon, after a tough day with Landon, as she gave him his afternoon snack, she watched her son fold his hands and say, "Amen" before he ate his raisins. That little act of faith erased the stress of the day and reminded her why they both made the decision for her to stay home with Landon.   Ryan is still an avid golfer, huge Texans fan (although I have tried valiantly to convert him to become a Steelers fan), and continues to enjoy his job in sales at Callaway Golf.  

Jenna's Corner

Jenna

Hello family and friends and Merry Christmas!!

A lot has changed since last year, I no longer have to say I am working on getting my Associates Degree...I got it!  I graduated in July and have my treasured piece of paper hanging on my wall.  I still plan on going to school to pursue being a makeup artist and masseuse.  I just need to find an institution that is far enough away that I will have no choice but to move out.  The search is on.

In the meantime, I surrendered myself to adulthood, got dressed up and joined the world of retail.  I currently slave away at Victoria Secret and New York & Company.  I have a lot of fun at both...but I must say I am paid better being a Dog Sitter.  I can no longer wear my jeans and graphic tees.  I have to wear 'big girl' or as they say, 'professional' clothing now.  The nerve.  I really had to let go of the Peter Pan Syndrome I had so long embraced.  However, they give me discounts so I can buy even more professional clothes.  My closet is slowly losing its color and is fading to black (yes, work dress code).  And sadly, I can no long wear my super cute heels, at least not at work. No more heels. Flats. Always. When working.

I'm still very involved at my church in the Young Adult Ministry.  It's like my youth group in high school, except we have cars, and no curfews.  We discuss our faith and topics that relate to being a, you guessed it, young adult.  Many young professionals are part of this ministry, so it's nice to have new friends to hang out with when you are still living in your hometown.  

Being an aunt is like the coolest thing ever.  Landon is super smart.  I never thought I would get so excited about watching a baby roll over, crawl, walk and talk for the first time, but amazingly I do.  The best part about being an aunt is that I get to spend time with Landon, play and spoil him then give him back only coincidentally the exact moment he gets fussy.  He is such a loving boy.  I am really lucky I have him for a nephew. 

Landon and Auntie Jenna are all smiles at the tree farm!

Landon is as tall as this sweet Charlie Brown Christmas Tree!

Well, I guess that's it.  Besides earning my degree, having three part-time jobs, and keeping my room clean 76% of the time, that's about all the changes I have made for 2012.  I hope this finds you and your family well and I wish you the happiest of holidays.

Tune in next year for more updates.

Yours truly, 

Jenn

Adam's Turn!

Hello and Merry Christmas!

Well, I'm in my final year of grad school at Boston University.
I returned to Boston without my best buddy, Ducati because the new apartment I am in has a no animal policy.  But I have to say while I really miss Ducati, I was lucky to find a great apartment, along with four great roommates!

At the beginning of 2012 I released my AJ Adams
"Heart to Give" CD, with all of my original music .  My buddy Alex McKee and I had the opportunity  perform songs from the CD, along with other music in gigs from New York to LA.

Alex and AJ

Performing in LA with Alex and Clayton!

Each month of the summer was a special wedding I was honored to be involved.  First I played trumpet and sang at my good friend from high school, Jessica's wedding, who was married at West Point.  Then I was honored to be the "second" best man at my oldest friend Clayton's (and Tala) wedding.  A month later I played at the wedding of two close friends of the family, Spencer (Clayton's brother) and Anna Smith.

So if I am not playing a horn, I am strumming a guitar and singing.
In May I graduate from Boston U with a Masters in Trumpet Performance. So now begins the auditions for a real job!  Prayers are really appreciated as I continue to pursue a career in music!
Wishing y'all a Merry Christmas and Happy 2013!
Adam

Joe Heads into the Homestretch!

Hello Everyone!

Well, I am inside the last 10 months of my commercial flying career.  In September, I have to retire from Southwest Airlines before my birthday.  I love my job and mentally I just cannot see myself not flying after 41 years!  But, I also look forward to what God has in store for the next adventure of my life with Kathie.

I continue to blog for Southwest Airlines and this year I am chronically each month of my last year with a blog column "Ten Months to go for Captain Joe"-- then counting down to the day before my birthday or should I say my retirement on the blog "Nuts about Southwest".

We are so blessed to count you among our family and friends!  Wishing all of you a very Merry Christmas!
Joe

Kathie Gets the Last Word

This past year God has blessed us with so many of the beautiful aspects of life!

We had the opportunity to have good friends visit us--one happens to be a high school friend of mine, Bill and his bride Mary Ann came from North Caroline for the Restoring Love Event.  The other friend was Carol from New York City.  Joe has known Carol since grade school--they played in the band together at school, Joe with his trumpet and Carol with her flute!  Carol is one of the most respect and acclaimed flutist performing today, and is a professor at Juilliard.  It is always wonderful to spend time with people who live outside of Texas!

Bill, MA, Joe and Kathie at Restoring Love
at Cowboys Stadium

A photo booth I set up for Anna & Spencer's Bridal Shower
Jenna, Kathie and Sara

Celebrated the weddings of several very close family friends!

Mother of the Bride and Hostesses of Anna's shower

Clayton and Tala's bridal shower

Tala and Clayton

Enjoyed a First Birthday Party for our grandson, Landon!

Landon turns one!

Rejoiced with Jenna earning her Associates Degree!

Kathie and Jenn

Treasured the time I spent with a life-long friend, Diane in Sewickley, PA!

Reunited with a group of my Alpha Xi Delta Sorority Sisters at Clarion University, in the hills of Pennsylvania!  A joyful time!

Blessed to be actively engaged in a wonderful church we have been members since we were newlyweds.

Prayed for dear friends and family members who were struggling with illnesses.

Praised God for those whose health is back to normal.

I can't close without mentioning our four-legged family members:
Ellie, Piper (our Australian Shepherds)
and Adam's sweet dog Ducati--they bring us laughter, a lot of love--not to mention fur!

Adam's dog, Ducati

As 2012 comes to a close, and we begin to look to embrace the New Year that is upon us, we know we are so lucky to have you in our lives!

We wish you many blessings of joy, good health and hope for a wonderful 2013!

Kathie, Sara, Adam, Jenna and Joe

I Lasso the reason for the season, the birth of Jesus Christ!

I hope you will stop back at kathielassosthemoon.blogspot.com for more family news!

God bless you and those you love this Christmas!

from the Gautille's!  

Love, 

Joe, Kathie, Adam and Jenna Gautille
Sara, Ryan and Landon Corl

Felt Like I was Back at My College Dorm

I have been meaning to share with you the great weekend I had last month with women I have not seen since 1979 when many of them graduated from college. 

I didn't realize until I connected with a sorority sister last fall that my sorority returned every year the week BEFORE homecoming to have a reunion.
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Being an Alpha Xi Delta at Clarion University was such a big part of my growing up in during my college years.  So, when I saw that they had been having reunions for years and I was just learning about it, made me so excited for this fall to arrive, because come hell or high water, I was going on the weekend to see these wonderful ladies!

I reached out to the sister I connected with on Facebook, Mary Lynne, who graduated a year before me.  While we spent this past year following each other on Facebook, and messaging plans to meet up and share a hotel room with another sorority sister Cindy--it never phased me or entered my head, "Would we have anything in common after all of thIese years?"

Well the weekend finally arrived.  I was blessed to have a friend in my hometown to also visit while in Pittsburgh for the weekend, as I now live in Texas.  Diane has been my friend since 4th grade!  

(left to right) Me and my dear friend Diane
in Sewickley

She still lives in our wonderful hometown in the sweetest home, with an affectionate dog and a boat load of wonderful memories for us to laugh and talk for hours on end.  

Diane took me to meet up with Mary Lynne.  She asked me if I would recognize her, and I told her I felt sure I would...and we did...

The moment we gave each other a huge hug and squealed with delight of recognizing each other, we were off to Clarion!

The weekend was everything and more than I had hoped for...these lovely women, whom I remember vividly calling me a scumbag during pledging--I found that deep love for them as if we never had been a part.

Alpha Xi Delta Sisters with the beautiful back drop of Pennsylvania in the fall!

More Sisters meet up for lunch at Bob's Sub Shop!

Five of us arrived Friday night!  Oh the stories you can tell after one or two Margaritas!

We went on a Wagon Ride of a beautiful property outside of Clarion!  Beautiful day!

My Big Sis, Cindy surprised us all!  I was so excited to see her!

There were times throughout the weekend while we were in our hotel room getting caught up on each other's happiness and sorrow we have experienced in our lives--I envisioned all of us at Nair Hall on the Alpha Xi Suite bouncing into a room and talking about boys, diets, college professors, life...

These women and many more who were not able to come for the reunion this year...really helped shape me into the person I am today.  

And as one of the husband's (who also happens to be a friend of mine from college days--his wife is my big sis in the sorority) said to me following the weekend at Clarion when I messaged him on LinkedIn how great it was to see him and my big sis Cindy.  He responded, "Thanks Kathie...great to see you as well!  I said to Cindy later that night what a great group of women she knows from Clarion/Alpha Xi.  All very real, very grounded!"  All the best, Mike

That is how blessed I was--I am--to have big hearts, and loving, real women I not only call Sisters, but call them dear friends...even after 30 years!

I Lasso Alpha Xi Delta Sisters and a great deal of love!

Just a Pot and a Colander?

 

A Melancholy Moment

I recently returned from Tampa where I had the real pleasure of taking care of my sweet dad.  My dad, who just returned to his home after spending 4 months in a rehab center due to several falls.  He is trying to navigate his home with a walker and wheelchair.  

We spent several days having great talks--many of them were about my dear mom, who died 12 years ago this month.  We laughed, we got teary-eyed, but most of all we remember her with great joy.  Shortly after one of our conversations about her, I went into his kitchen and started making dinner for the two of us.  As I was making dinner I saw these two gems pictures above...and I felt my mom was in his kitchen with me!

The large pot cooked many a dinner...I can still see bubbling steam from potatoes or a pot of homemade chicken noodle soup simmering!  The yellowed colander held many a pasta meals or lettuce or fruit for washing--while showing their age--like all of us, it was sheer delight to rediscover them and a joyful melancholy moment captured in my heart!  Who knew a pot and colander would bring such emotion just at the sight of them?  

My mom and me
on the day of my Holy Communion

I miss you mom, I am so blessed with fond, loving memories of you!  God is so good! 

I Lasso being blessed with a wonderful loving mom!