When I was a freshman in college, I remember reading a book that even to this day...some 35 years later I think about...
The book is entitled Passages - Predictable Crises of Adult Life.
Gail Sheehy, the author of Passages, wrote about each decade of adult life--gave it a catchy name, often incorporating alliteration and examined some of the general life crises that occurs when one reaches such a milestone in life.
I don't really know why I remember this book so vividly. At the time I was 19...I guess I was interested in why she labeled my upcoming 20's, "The Trying 20's"! Yet, I remember pulling it off my bookshelf again when I became a mother. In some ways, Ms. Sheehy while using a general brush stroke in describing the various phases of life--for me, she seemed to capture the essence of each decade...a 20-something generally is breaking away from home and a trying to discover where he/she fits into the world. There is Catch the 30's, the Forlorn 40's and the Refreshed 50's. The phase for 50-somethings is expressed as the best of life for those who let go of old roles and find renewal of purpose. Hmmm...
I see our kids going through "The Trying 20's"...all at a different pace, which makes it so wonderful, because each one is so unique...but I am trying to decide if I feel Refreshed at 50! This whole "letting go" thing...letting go of the old roles I am struggling with right now more than Joe is...but I don't know if that is because he is 10 years my senior and entering a new passage of his own.
Oh, I know it's is an overstated cliche' "We've done our job when we give our kids wings"...but there needs to be a disclaimer with this overly familiar theme..."as we give our kids wings, it stings!"
We have given our kids wings...and I am trying valiantly to grow up and be a Refreshed 50 something...but for over half my life, our children, my husband...they have been my purpose.
So...this week our oldest daughter prepares not only her third grade classroom for the new school year, Sara and her husband Ryan are making preparations for having the family
together for their son, Landon's Baptism!
Sunday morning at 5:30am our son, Adam packed up his Xterra, a U-haul trailer and dog Ducati and headed on a three day drive to Boston where he will be attending grad school for Trumpet Performance.
|Heather and Adam celebrate the day they met|
which was their first day at Baylor University, their freshman year--5 years ago!
Heather is headed to Toronto for Culinary school in September.
|Jenna's energy is contagious! A new Mary Kay Consultant|
|Jenna at the Mary Kay convention in Dallas a few weeks ago!|
I love spending time with Joe--I am really looking forward to doing more traveling with him. I also enjoy our time at home. I have also been blessed to be volunteering my time on our church parish pastoral council. We have been members of St. Ann for 26 years!
So these passages we go through--while our kids continue to explore the "Trying 20's"-- I think I will cherish the roles I have had and will finally let go...give those old roles I embraced for half of my life--the wings, and start to truly embrace a new purpose for myself!
Oh, I can't close out this blog entry without mentioning how life has changed for our four-legged, canine family members. My Aussie, Ellie, is an only "dog" at home now. She is missing our beloved Pirate, who died earlier this year and now is starting to miss Ducati--since he left with Adam for Boston, she confused right now and a bit of a cling-on...but she knows she is loved!
|Ellie, Pirate, Ducati waiting for the OK to come into the house!|
|Kathie and Ellie November 2010|
I Lasso trying to truly embrace
The Refreshing 50's!